News and Tribune


July 15, 2013

CUMMINS: The Tooth Fairy is a myth


Couldn’t get Clooney out of my mind — parties, starlets, solid food to chew. When the house sold at a loss, Pullum took tongs pulling like a mother pushes during birth. He then inserted six steel posts deep down into the jaw bones under my bloody-good gums. After steel and bone meshed for three months, Fairy man then screwed six locators into the steel posts where the Hollywood teeth would be attached.

I was a child, suckling on Jell-O, mashed potatoes and cream of wheat. I threw tantrums dining on gallons of split-pea soup.

Take it like a man I said. Think of the hungry kids throughout. I must believe that if I don’t watch out, Santa will never come. And when the promised teeth are hooked to my stainless-steel posts, I’ll believe in the Tooth Fairy again. Fantasy is OK for the young and the old. Those in between will grow old to dream on soft pillows, too.

— Contact Terry Cummins at

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